The Realistic Joneses by Will Eno

Author:Will Eno [Eno, Will]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781559367929
Publisher: Theatre Communications Group

Scene 7

Night. Pony and John’s kitchen. The now-repaired lamp is lit and sitting on the table. John is sitting, a little lost in a haze. Jennifer stands, nearby, or perhaps they have entered together in the transition. Pause.

JOHN: How long have you been standing there?

JENNIFER: We walked in, together, from the front yard.

JOHN: That’s right.

JENNIFER: Are you okay?

JOHN: Definitely. I mean, I’m not a doctor or a psychologist, but, I think I’m all right. Although, I’m not a marriage counselor or a beautician, but, yeah, I’m hanging in there.

JENNIFER: You had a seizure?

JOHN: No. Incorrect. You are incorrect, sir. Madam. (He stares off and slowly straightens his collar or neatens his hair)

JENNIFER: Why don’t we go to the emergency room, just to make sure.

JOHN: I’ve never seen you at night, except that first time. And another couple times when I was looking over there.

JENNIFER: Pony came over.

JOHN: I asked her to go get you. I didn’t want her to see me, if things got ugly.

JENNIFER: What do you mean, ugly?

JOHN: There’s a few scenarios. Did you see my stupid fireworks?

JENNIFER: They were sweet. She said you were celebrating.

JOHN: Yeah, I guess that’s the word. (He blinks a few times. Closes his eyes for a second)

JENNIFER: Is this lamp bothering you?

JOHN: No, come on, I love this lamp.

JENNIFER: I mean the light. You’re not seeing, like, little flares in the corner of your eyes, are you?

JOHN: Well, let’s see. (He tries to look into the corners of his eyes. Then stares out, intently. Maybe he imagines himself, very clearly, dying, or, perhaps, sitting in a chair, in a severely disabled state. Brief pause) Sorry, no. Negative. No little flares.

JENNIFER: Well, that’s good.

JOHN: I probably seem like I have it all under control.

JENNIFER: Yeah, you really don’t.

JOHN (Very brief pause): I was so glad I couldn’t see Pony’s face when I went blind.

JENNIFER: I wonder what I looked like.

JOHN: I’m sure you were fine.

JENNIFER: Bob got really claustrophobic. He never believed me when I was saying, one more step this way, or, it’s two more steps down.

JOHN: That couldn’t have felt very good.

JENNIFER: No. It didn’t. Like I would want him to fall down and get hurt.

JOHN: I wish Pony had helped me, but I was glad she didn’t.

JENNIFER: You should go see someone and make sure everything’s all right. You could go see Bob’s doctor, Dr. Leavey. He’s a specialist but he’s very good.

JOHN: I’ve seen him a few times.

JENNIFER: You have?

JOHN: That was why we moved here, originally. Don’t tell Pony, though.

JENNIFER: You can’t just say that.

JOHN: I just did. And please, don’t. Come on, you knew all this.

JENNIFER: No, I didn’t. How would I know that? What did Dr. Leavey say?

JOHN: What’s he supposed to say?

JENNIFER: So, I’m trying to understand, you have HLS?

JOHN: It sounds so sporty when you use the initials.

JENNIFER: God, I’m sorry. This is just, I mean, what are the chances?

JOHN: One-in-something, I guess. Which is really all you need.

JENNIFER: So, you’ve started treatment?

JOHN: Or,

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